For the last few years I haven't received any festive or celebration cards, while I have been writing Christmas cards regularly to all my extended families for almost 3 consecutive years (except for the year 2010 - as I was busy preparing for my wedding).
I have been reading online and reading some books too - and I am being suggested that I should drop these people off my list who do not care to reply the letters or do not have the courtesy to send a simple greeting card.
Most of my extended family tells me its better to call then to write long letters. But I don't receive any calls either. How can people so busy? Many times I wonder if I am going wrong somewhere or is it that people just don't care? I feel neglected! It feels as if I am doing all that I can to keep the "flames" on, while the opposite is true for them.
My grandma always says that family is always family and I have learned from her not to give up on our loved ones. So my latest project is to write to them and send greetings and mail them all that I can and give myself a time frame of 2-3 years before I drop them off the list. I pray that this relationship of sending and receiving mails can be restored. Its not just a tradition or a culture or a ritual but a way to say that,
I care, I miss you, I am thinking of you and Just because...
Many times I have realized that my friends and family who call me get lost within few minutes of conversation. They do not know what to say or ask beyond those typical questions like,
"how are you? how is your husband? how are studies? you doing good?".
I might sound frustrated but this is the truth. The calls are not intentional, just a formality so that they can say, "oh, we do call her from time to time".
I am not saying that I am perfect with maintaining this tradition or that I am so good with sending cards and so on... I agree its not easy to write letters - it requires time, and thinking
and an intention. You pour out your heart to someone when you write -
either email or traditional mail. And that's why it required effort, and
that's why letters are treasured and people require a response.
Sigh... me and my frustration.